But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize