Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
did i walk over a car last night?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
