I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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