Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
