I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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