Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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