he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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