But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
