it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
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I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
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I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
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