my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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