you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NoShamevember. You game?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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