he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize