i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Randomize
