I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
