so that wasnt chicken after all
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
