I'm so fucking centered right now
it hurts more in the daytime
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
