Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just sucked dick on a ferry
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
