Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
