i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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