How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
