these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
he puts the penis in happiness.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Randomize
