this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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