that's an acceptable place to lick
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
This beer is not sobering me up at all
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
