My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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