I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
