I'm really into asian looking animals
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
