it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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