Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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