don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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