ugly people sure do ruin things
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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