i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
kristin has been a bad kristin
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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