Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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