Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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