looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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