Got a toothbrush?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
