I think I am morally bankrupt
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
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