trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
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