so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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