Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize