: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
