all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I just had sex on a roof
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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