just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
