Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Randomize