it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
