I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
