i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
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