this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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