Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize