no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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