Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
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i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
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I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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